A breakdown of a relationship is never easy especially when children are involved. Eventually one parent leave’s the family home and the subject of the children and when do you get to see them.
Usually if there has been no domestic violence in the relationship everything starts out fine. Everything is done with the good intentions for the children. Then things start to change, one parent discovers that the other parent has a new partner. Will they be expected to call them mum/dad, what do they do when they spend time with them.
Are they nice to your children or are they horrible and abusive or do they just neglect them. Probably even worse does the parent who has custody of the child neglect the child/children in favour of the new partner.
Your mind starts to wonder all the bad things that could be happening to your child/children. It’s human nature and we always think of the worse that could happen, it’s very rare that we think of the best possible things that could happen. The mind is a very dark place indeed.
Once we plant our own seeds of doubt there is no stopping it, the imagination runs wild. Where once upon a time dropping the kids of 10 minutes late wasn't a problem. However now it is, do confront the other parent there and then or do you sit and fester.
You could send a sharp text message or you could drop off your child/children late the next time its your turn. Before you know it the little tit for tat has got completely out of hand. Where does it go now, you no longer actually talk and the text messages have now just become abusive and disrespectful.
In the first instance we would suggest mediation to try and smooth things over for the wellbeing of the children. After all what you do now and to each other will effect the child psychologically. If a parent is stressed and angry all the time it will be passed onto the child/children.
Get help, get a 3rd party to mediate it is a much more cost effective solution to your differences. Of course there may be reasons that mediation can not take place
Issues With Mediation
The problem with mediation is that both parents need to be willing to go in the first instance. You cannot force the other parent into mediation. In this instance you need to explain this to your mediator because before going to court you need to have tried meditation.
The other instance of not attempting mediation is when domestic abuse has been present within the marriage.
The Final Step, a Prohibited Steps Order
You need to have gone to mediation or attempted mediation before you go to court. At this point it is better to be prepared and decide what outcome you really want. You also need to consider what is best for the child whatever age they are. Non contact of one parent is rarely a postive outcome for the child/children, except from fear of violence or abuse.
Remember this is for the welfare of the child and not for your benefit.
Can I Take My Child on Holiday?
You can only do this if the court agrees. In order for that to happen, you must appear before a magistrate and prove that you are not likely to leave the country and not come back. It also has to be something that your ex-partner agrees to.
Can a Prohibited Steps Order Be Changed?
The answer to this is yes, but only if all parties are in agreement and can satisfy a magistrate at Family Court. If there have been instances in the past where visitation rights have been exceeded or ignored, the magistrate may feel he or she has no other choice but to rule against any proposed changes to the order. Also, he or she must take into account the effects such changes may have on the child (or children)
What Can I Do If The Other Parent Doesn’t Come Back?
There is no easy way to deal with this question. The chances are if they have taken them to a country that has not entered into an agreement with the UK, it may be hard to have your child returned to you. At present there are 45 countries that have entered into an agreement with the UK